Tears&Fears:Jos Nigeria

Woke up on a God given morning, the smoke in the air contested my Breathing.

It was blood it was war, all this eluded my Believing

A friend like my brother, by some lies and deceiving pursues me with blind Grieving

As I ran, i asked myself what could I be Seeing?

Jumped Over hurdles of bodies I once exchanged Greetings

It was religion it was politics it was just too Disbelieving

Children carry knives and guns when they should be Schooling

Mother chop up while at home Nursing

Fathers at war when for Nigeria should be Working

Right before our very eyes, the future is slowly Dieing.

Religious war, I wonder what God you are Believing

Ethnic cause, I wonder How it is God you Serving

Is it me or is it you that you are Deceiving?

I wonder what you tell yourself when you do all this senseless Killing

Peace Had always been the beautiful Bride

Side by side our collaboration was our Pride

One day, all this was good Bye

When did friendship, when did humanity Die?

Children these days live with Fears and Tears

My childhood was nothing like Theirs

This really cant be fair, I just cant let them drown in Despair

I must do what i can to bring some Repair.

All being Said

Now they say he died so soon. making him look more mortal than immortal. maybe so we don't revere further. Not really much to bother. Fairy tale, fiction and all the various depictions. The thing is, the moral of the story is I am just like you. Yea, the shroud of Turin.

Do you Know

I ask because I dont

Know the reason why stopping this, I wont

End this feeling, I cant

Sometimes I feel its all I want

This can pass for a need

You grow in me like seed

Being cause intent for my deeds

On your aura, I feed

This is Love, I must have been deceived

Lived to know love in the rules

But I see in love, the moment is your cue

Glue of life I wanna share with you

My world crumbles except for thoughts of you

It floats above

Defiles yet energizes resolve

Its a space you find

Enough to bring hearts of your Kind

This in you I know i can find

Trust me

do not, dont pay me no mind

No fright, let go the fight

let unity taxi in and take flight

Its a new world, by the time its night

In this struggle,

pride is toppled

Its called love but i cant explain it

Come with me and get to know it

Sweet Remembering

Everyone knows, i am the sleeping dragon

no wonder i dont see shutters when it shows

Born of fire calm in my lair,

yet though i must live on the tongues of the liar.

maybe it should sleep forever

in a world where u know u are not the only power

i may know even destructions for reconstruction

Should the dragons sleep forever

or come a day i must make u remember

For in this evil world i was never a member,

Funny how i must make me remember

how much i live each moment through December

Funny how i must remember

kindness, sweet pleasure of friends

sweet treasure of family trends.

Dragon nest dragon lair

provide inspirer my prayer

Eyes of love

Deep, the thoughts in my mind when I see you in my heart

Deep, the feelings in my soul when my emotions seek a path to follow

\Deep in my sleep when I dream of cities of Gold and a crystal dome

Deep in my laughter the reason there is a smile in my heart

\Deep in my silence the words to the song of the unborn

Deep concentration when you speak like a song never understood

\Deep in those myths that keep wishing on every star

but even deeper in my prayer that my wish may come to pass

\Deep, the pain in my heart when I feel but cant see you

Deep, you cause sorrow if maybe if I don't feel you tomorrow

\Deep my regrets that I did not say what you thought I may

Deep my sadness that you feel everything has gone bad

\Deep contemplation about what you meant or couldn't say

Deep, my superstition about just going with intuition

even deeper my belief that true love brings the soul relief

When shall we live

I was born, I was told to love and respect these your parents they gave birth to you! This I did, then I know nothing more. I was thought, I was schooled had my whole life ruled, I just found out I was fooled.
I obeyed, I prayed, cooked I cleaned, I worked, I arranged, I did everything to make everything for you easy coz this was the right thing to do. I then grew : one thing I knew but you would not let me do nothing I wanted to do. There had to be some thing else, some other way, but you scolded when I dear to think. Someday I would live someday I will be free!
But when shall I see this freedom, when shall I be able to live? Coz it seems everyday, I am living for you. But I must find a way to sustain me, so somehow I fend to live, but I still live with limitations. I must think of each deed, if it will please you. Oh yes, yes I am afraid of what the world would think of me even more you, will they love me, will it accept me? Oh my God will they judge me? No No no, this cant happen, not to me: somebody… …Your Name . so I live with limitations, now I decide to, it is my only option. Someday I would live, be old like you, rule, talk, negotiate, contemplate, do what ever I wish to do, start living life like a grown adult. So I wait, I work, I live….. I just wait for time to take me there. There are many of you, all kings, all rulers of boys like me, you all must rule, you all must possess, your kingdom must be bigger. So you fight, you scheme, you live even longer, cos as far as you know, this must never end. You even forgot that I should also have a turn to live.
So you fight one another, you kill, you steal, you put me in front of the battle line, I might even die, just so that you will expand your kingdom. The problem is, you have stolen all today, so what about tomorrow? I have died, I have gone mad, I have lost my soul, so in your huge kingdom, who will you rule? I have all died;
I am thirty 32, buy my age you had me, so when will I have my own me? I cant even drink alcohol and forget that you enslaved me. I cant even start to dream that I might own my own land. SO you make the Jobs harder to get by upping the standard, so I may keep school while you stay in and keep looting. You are buying time, but you are wasting mine. I am 35, I am ready to work, since I just finished a PHD, coz the job now that its my turn in very demanding. I will keeping looking in the vanguard, guardian, news week, thisday, maybe some day I will see a job that accepts graduates of 35. There must be, coz you told me I had to go to school that long, so you should know that I will be done and come for my job.
Its been yrs and I am still looking, but these papers cant be serious, there was no opening for me. Suddenly I am too old, but how? You are still alive! So what are you? There must be a time when one day they will just hand it over to us and soon too. So lets all wait. But hey, they bought new chairs, so they want to sit on longer, rule us longer, keep us enslaved for longer. They forget that we are not getting younger. But look, there children; they own houses, the have businesses, the even have families. Why do they say we are still not ready. Why do we still fight for them campaigning, kill our brother in this struggle, enslaving ourselves even more? We must stop this silly thoughts, we just drop those shinny weapons, Pick up those thinking faculties, pick up your dreams and visions. These people, the old men, they are living for us, they are doing our time. If we don’t live now, then when? We must take our freedom, maybe even fight for freedom. Its our time to LIVE!

A question of understanding or a question of fact?

In search of spiritual equilibrium i have conversations with anyone with a spiritual perspective of this so called life.
I was conversing with a friend of mine, she is of the Christian Science faith. I need some answers or perspectives about some aspects of our lives. It will help me understand somethings i feel. I asked her about marriage! " in christian science, are u allowed only one wife?" she told me yes but it has to be your soul mate and if he/she is not your soul mate, u were allowed to divorce and marry again. This is a distinction btw christian science and contemporary Christianity which has no place for divorce.Then i asked how u knew who your soul mate is? I was told it was all about finding a common ground in both personalities and persons. I wondered if that meant it would always feel good when you find that mate. As in be in a state of bliss each time u were with this person and everything just seem automatically right. Is there room for conflict? are u always gonna agree? will there just be perfect synchrony always? new question i sort to know. This was the main question i sort to find the answer to. So i asked, if two neighboring nations had conflict over boarders and one country was dominating, and kept pushing the other backward and gain more grounds, the other country kept on conceding ground until it had very little left but it didn't mind. It didn't fight back. Is this a common ground? in the sense that there was no feeling of dissatisfaction by both nations and there was peace. Even though other nations looking felt it was totally unfair to the smaller nation and viewed the larger nation as a bully. Do they have a right to insist for fairness based on our human understanding of what fairness is? even though there was no conflict between the parties involved. First we need to ask, who determines what is fair? My friend told me, there is no problem with this as long as there was no conflict between the nations so this is their common ground.
So, i related this to human relations. If common ground had no definition of boundaries are some of us destined to be disadvantaged ( by human definition) and always concede? this is because some people always don't mind bending over backward for other people and never mind doing this. Does this represent a balance of common ground definitions concept i was just told about? One person does everything to satisfy another while the other does nothing to reciprocate and the one person feels no sense of being shortchange of emotional compliments. Even though to the world it is by our understanding obvious that this is cruelly unfair even creating an image of one as heartless and cruel. Is this allowed? can we judge fairness even if the situation does not affect us?
So what i am asking is what is the balance of nature with relation to relating with people? and are some people naturally gonna be doormats to some other and love doing it and thus peace prevails? could this be their role in the world? or fairness really defined by equality?
Can somebody tell me? also considering the correlations between fairness and peace!
And if the answer is based on personal understand by everyone, then what is the basis of properly defined life?

Dream

I dream, it’s the world for my spirit

His only place for peace coz there is freedom in it

Expression of will, a void and realization of what is real

In a trance of finding and knowing.

people you love, things you fear, all you dear

Your heart cries: now you hear

Spirit and body communicate

Uncontrolled inspect of when we relate

Pain like I felt of heart break

My world of love, you would not take

The body, the soul ,you choose to violate

Feel and see, they say participate

I see you, I feel it still when I awake

Sleeping and feeling

Living and weeping

The same understanding

Felt you would leave

Was told you would not give

But in you I chose to believe

Sooner than today, I stand in shame

Forgiving is a totally holy place

But I am imperfect, see the emotions on my face

My body wont let my soul stay pure

I am in chains, this I am sure

Pain, regret, all betray my forgetting

Liberation begets freedom, now my pursuing

Hurt me in my soul and left a hole

Reparation a fete only for your own

I tell of this story coz

For the world I am sorry

For lessons not taken

The principle simply mistaken

I pray for awakening

Though it came late for me

I must show how much joy it can be

Maybe you will learn desperately

This is the moral of my story

That one day I may not worry

Or fear that you might tell the same story

Cant You See?

Commit my every need

I just want to meet u with every want

A cry for your smile

Die to hear u laugh

I need you to feel every good sense

While I wait in my suspense

This is common sense

I can wait while you sleep and wake

Smile in the morning light then I lay me down for my sake

Walk through thorny forest

because you heard about birds who at the other end nest rest

Let me see for you

Or I can just say, ill do anything for you!

Never forgive myself

I was at work when the rain soaked you

Or blame myself

Coz sorrow somehow in your world found you

I could have done something to help you

I must get you the new shoe

School can wait too for you

Times when I cant be there,

don’t you see I still care?

I feel I can push mountains,

I can drink up a fountain

What else more priceless

What thing more beautiful

What sent so sweet?

Guard proper so dutiful

No king in his highness

No Queen or majesty,

Is greater than purity

Cant you just see

I might find the words to say the sky is sometimes blue

Just like the fog in the morning is called dew,

Like the lights called stars,

Like the string of colors, or rainbow

About how some feelings are painful

Some things for you I must do,

Everything I feel is about you

I do them for you

Its me, or maybe you just cant see tha..t…………………….

I.

So i say

I will do my best to meet everyones needs, cos I am concerned and I understand. i do not know everything but I give my something. If someday you see me and say, I do not represent you in anyway, just be patient we can all have our own God given day. If in time I dont not increase my understanding enough to meet you, one thing I know for sure is, i will be not be here forever. If after me comes another, he may feel just like you or the like of you my brother.

Dont Give up wanting, find patience, seek understanding and light will touch you.

It is always better than a dark fight.

Beautiful Nights

There are many reasons why many things are beautiful

The moon, maybe because its blue

a person maybe because its you

and when the moon gets full

I am blown witj thougts of youIin the mellow moonlight

I see delight in the hollow of your eyes

Like shadows caste in the dark

You manifest in me in parts

the moon at night, with you feels right

underneath the stars with lights shinning bright

I behold you as my beauty and the Queen of my Night

Its Us

Its all just pathetic

our life, its relics

yea say I sound prophetic

it just that I am being authentic

how easy for you to turn a blind eye

at least take a peek with one eye

oh my, I just must try

to save my world right after I cry.

Destiny, walks right next to me

I put away my beliefs

open my eyes one day in disbelief

its still same as when everyone tot me insane

I am still the same

dose not matter what was said must not give me pain

but I still cant walk away leave that kid in the rain.

This is the time I have been praying

when my thoughts and fears are the new believing

heal this world in which we live in

dont believe its all about the world you live in.

As is still

You see, i have always been me,

yes, asked the questions that u never perceived

ah always your scolds i am told

some things are untold

so, i stay quiet in my heave

watching, let me see what this reveals

wow this is a dangerous con-heave

now u see always in God i believed.

with sway, with swagga flow down this rocky worlds hills

so i pray i grow, this is Godly perceived

love me, coz i love you, my heart, my mind, my unity shield.

Help me, lets heals this, and enjoy the Godly yummies

love or dont love me, dont even know what that means.